VALGOL programming language

VALGOL is a fictional programming language invented as a joke by John Unger Zussman. It appears in a humorous list of "lesser known languages", published in InfoWorld in 1982 and later posted to Usenet. This is the original text pertaining to VALGOL:

    VALGOL ... (With special thanks to Dan and Betsy "Moon  Unit"
Pfau)  -  From its modest beginnings in southern California's San
Fernando Valley, VALGOL is enjoying a dramatic surge of populari-
ty across the industry.
 
    VALGOL commands include REALLY, LIKE, WELL and Y$KNOW.  Vari-
ables are assigned with the  =LIKE and =TOTALLY operators.  Other
operators include the "CALIFORNIA BOOLEANS", FERSURE, and  NOWAY.
Repetitions of code are handled in FOR-SURE loops. Here is a sam-
ple VALGOL program:
 
          14 LIKE, Y$KNOW (I MEAN) START
          %% IF
          PI A =LIKE BITCHEN AND
          01 B =LIKE TUBULAR AND
          9  C =LIKE GRODY**MAX
          4K (FERSURE)**2
          18 THEN
          4I FOR I=LIKE 1 TO OH MAYBE 100
          86 DO WAH + (DITTY**2)
          9  BARF(I) =TOTALLY GROSS(OUT)
          -17 SURE
          1F LIKE BAG THIS PROGRAM
          ?  REALLY
          $$ LIKE TOTALLY (Y*KNOW)
 
    VALGOL is characterized by  its  unfriendly  error  messages.
For  example, when the user makes a syntax error, the interpreter
displays the message, GAG ME WITH A SPOON!

It is obviously a spoof of the ALGOL programming language and San Fernando Valley slang.

The other languages in the list are SIMPLE, SLOBOL, LAIDBACK, SARTRE, FIFTH, C-, LITHP and DOGO.

Like SARTRE, it has probably been taken too far now that a full language and interpreter have been written based on the joke.

External links

• Usenet post
• VALGOL implementation
  • Documentation within site